Dear Gideon,

Got a nice, comprehensive list of how to attain a significant other for the winter months? I’m a freshman without a car, so I’m limited to on-campus-only. Seeking companionship. That’s all.

Sincerely,

Winter is Coming

Dear Winter is Coming,

1. I caught your allusion there. Game of Thrones is always a crowd-pleaser. Get involved in some mainstream fandoms and bond over dragons!

2. Loiter in the mailroom. Not as sketchy as it sounds. Benson is a hotbed to meet people! They’ve got it all: Moe’s and an ATM! All one needs in life. Who knows, it could be true love at first package slip or an intense bond over a junior homewrecker burrito bowl.

3. Grab a slightly more hipster and expensive coffee at Campus Grounds, and check out the place for some eligible partners. You’re basically paying for the potential to meet other super cool, grunge people. And if not, unlimited cream and sugar, and some Spotify easy-listening!

4. The Mag Room: swipe on in, ladies and gentlemen. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, like a table cloth and baked potato with chives kind of love, you’ve come to the right floor of Reynolda.

5. Love Feast! Share a hot bun with the person next to you and feast on all that love. Love is, quite literally, in the air.

6. Campus Garden. Harvest season may be over, but love blossoms year round! Till up some soil, compost some apple cores, cultivate those new relationships and make horribly painful vegetable jokes. It’s foolproof.

7. Salem Hall? Sadly, lurking around this construction site probably has some slim chances of meeting people, but walk on over to Winston right across the street. Word is the new Bio Center is a great place to meet people while discussing DNA replication and Okazaki fragments … Modern. Romance.

8. Sit on a bench. Old fashioned, but welcoming. Worth a try? Maybe save this one for dire circumstances.

9. Hit the Bricks! The best version of yourself? Sweaty, out of breath, and running with a backpack for a great cause. Meet other people who are also interested in helping others!! Lay that (brick) foundation for a great relationship.

10. Be yourself. Cheesy? Yes. But, still valid despite its exploitation as a pithy aphorism in mainstream media? Also, yes.

Sincerely,

Gideon